Free comic book day almost turned into Jamie stomp around and throw things day. I hit up our local shop, Hero’s World, as I have been there in the past a bit. Unfortunately they are no longer the bad ass awesome shop they use to be. We got our free books (I chose Transformers vs. GI Joe) and then went to hunt for a new graphic novel. Those books are how I like to ingest my comic books. Anywho – its a small shop but the novels don’t seem to be anywhere and then I find a very small book stand full of nothing but DC and Marvel graphic novels. NOTHING ELSE!!! WTF?!!??! Seriously dickfucks? You have nothing else? I was soooo pissed. I was looking forward to a new novel all fucking week. We left the shop with nothing but our free books in hand and a big ball of anger in my belly. There was a bookstore just down the way so Eugene (my husband) made us go in and lo and behold they had a MUCH MUCH larger and mixed collection than the damn comic book store. I was again pissed that I had to end up in a BOOK store vs. the comic store to find what I wanted to buy. I ended up getting a Neil Gaiman graphic novel and was super ubber happy but was so disheartened by the comic book store being nothing more than a “collectible” store with but a few comics. I’ll never go there again now.
I am cleaning out my computer as I have been given a new laptop and the conversion of info from one to another needs to be seamless. I need to be able to use this opportunity to purge some of the massive amounts of “stuff” instead of just moving it to a new home. In doing so I came across the beginning of a horror story/novel that I had in my mind at some time, who knows how long ago. I’m thinking of continuing the work on this particular story. In any case, the below is what I found and I would LOVE some feedback. Feedback was my intention with this website all along so anything is fine. I take all criticism, good or bad, for what it is and hope that it can make what I do better.
Here it goes:
In a clap of thunder that shook the grounds of Southeast Texas, the world changed dramatically.
Daniel arose from his favorite easy chair in the beloved living room of his suburban Houston home. His body shook with each drop of rain that struck the pavement and sluiced down sidewalks. The lightening flashed like an atomic bomb and in the same instant Daniel ceased to be anymore. What now stood on his dark green berber carpet sucked in the smell of fresh meat along with the acrid scent of oxygen and carbon dioxide. It snapped Daniel’s head back and then sharply up, popping all the vertebrae inside Daniel all at once. It was preparing for the sweet, decadent feast of flesh this new place had to offer. It walked down a hall and out the front door. The wetness slammed into Daniel’s body and it smiled with his mouth. It/Daniel walked to the middle of the street and thrust it’s arms into the air. It howled into the night and slammed it’s arms back down to it’s side. The moment its arms touched its body the entire neighborhood was torn into oblivion. Houses were now laying in small splinters where whole homes were just standing. The cars where tiny mangled messes while the concrete of roads and sidewalks were now large chunks of rock. It’s body was drenched in rain water mixed with blood as it stood in the middle of the street savoring its treat.
“I AM DANIEL” It proclaimed, making Daniel his in name and body.
Angie sat in her bare room that was home and listened to the rain storm pouring buckets down around her. Literally around her; she was looking for the only bucket she had to catch the water from her ceiling when the room was lit with a brilliant and eerie flash of lightening. The deafening thunder that followed chilled her to the bone and made her jump in terror. She had never been in a rainstorm so loud and violent. She expected to find herself in the midst of a hurricane but this storm had come from the west not the coast. The meteorologist had said it was the most puzzling storm system he had ever seen warning the city that it would be a horrible down pour and to expect flooding on the magnitude of the 2001 Allison storm.
Angie Winston had been through many storms before, in fact, she was in town when Allison came through the city. She was stranded and almost drowned in a low lying intersection. She had climbed on top of her car and prayed that it didn’t rise past the roof of her Jeep. Angie had lived here in Houston her entire life, what little bit you could call a life. Her Mom died right after she was born and her Dad had never been around. She was raised by her already ancient Grandmother who always had good intentions but was too easy to fool. This gave Angie the ability to do what she wanted and get away with more than she should have ever thought of doing with herself. She was 12 the first time she got drunk and it was in a bar close to downtown where most of the shady people could be found on any given night. This was just the beginning in a sordid twist of life experiences. Angie never finished school and had never really cared to anyway. She had all she needed at 23; a job dancing at a semi-decent bar while running packages to clients as well, a place to put her head (albeit rather wet but still hers) and wheels to get her around the city. Houston may have lots to offer but if you don’t have a car then you don’t have the opportunities to make the kind of money Angie could in one day.
Right now she was cursing the day she decided to rent such a piece of sweltering shit house. It had seemed like such a great idea at the time. Gabe had told her about the place because it was so close to downtown and her bar but he left out the part about it being so close to the Wards. It was run down and there was always some sort of a siren blaring past during the most inconvenient times but it was cheap and didn’t raise any flags that might cause questions about her finances. She finally found her bucket next to the toilet in the bathroom. The previous night had definitely been another lesson in what not to drink. Angie grabbed the bucket and trudged back out to the one room of the house and stuck it under the torrent of water now coming through a rather large hole in her ceiling.
“Well, fuck.” Angie sighed.
I started this blog a few years ago with the intention of practicing and refining my writing as well as providing a place to post/promote my art. I have failed miserbly at this endeavor. I knew going in my life was a bit on the hectic side of living but not how much it would affect my ability to focus on something as simple as writing a few words or paragraphs each day. Instead of doing what I wanted I have sat idle or allowed the distractions of life to invade my plans. It also never occured to me that I would be concerned about writing on here about me, myself and my life. I question whether I’m going to upset someone or hurt feelings if I write certain things. I have always prided myself on being honest; honest to the point of being called a bitch but either way I don’t paint a rosy picture when there isn’t one. So, what happened to me? Why do I care? I have no idea. Maybe after all the years of being so honest to everyone and shrugging off the negative feedback I just can’t take that kind of interaction anymore. OR more plausibly, I’m starting to care more. Ugh. That thought kind of grosses me out.
In any case, I am going to try more and get more our of my head instead of holding it captive for fear of others. Writing, especially personal writing is going to upset people but those who know me and understand where I am at should be able to understand I’m just being me. So – if in writing you think “hey, that sounds like me” or even more so “wow, that was about me” just know I’m writing to get things out. I have to cleanse my brain or else I’m going to explode.
I currently find myself in a position of immense struggle between what is at work and what is at home. Home – things seem to be going relatively well. My son, his father and I are all taking therapy together to work out how to deal with each other given his complicated diagnosis (bipolar with Asperger’s). He is also taking new medication and everything seems to be on a good path. The usual chaotic nature of our home (read – tons of kids at the house at all times) seems to be winding down and fewer people are around on a daily basis. This is good because now the house is a bit more stable for both myself and my son. Work – SUUUUUUUUUUCKS! Not in the usual, I can’t stand that I have to work, kind of way but in the, this place is the shittiest place to work, kind of way. There is no communication and no cohesiveness to our department. Hell, my boss wears earplugs at work so she doesn’t have to hear anyone and refuses to answer her phone. WTF?!?
I am hoping to get back to painting and writing in earnest in the next couple of weeks. There is a juried art show I would like to participate in and hopefully be selected to be a part of it as well. Writing will hopefully keep coming to me slowly. Everyone always talks about how they could easily write a book or write anything really….I can say from the experience of the last few years, writing is one of the most difficult things you can decide to do with your life. It does not come easy and it is even harder when every sentence you write you go back and read immediately thinking its tripe and you trash it, starting all over again never to get even a page of words complete.
So – I’m still not sure what I’m doing and I don’t know if I ever will but I’m going to keep pushing. One day, I know, I will wake up and that drive to keep going, never giving up WILL pay off.
Sitting on my keyboard was the most delicious looking chocolate fudge cookie wrapped carefully in cellophane with a decorative ribbon of colors. I smiled to myself. It has been a month and everyday that I get to my desk I have had one of these waiting for me. Well, not this particular cookie. I have devoured all types of cookies this month from sugar to cheesecake flavored. It has been amazing. I leaned down to pick it up and start unwrapping my anonymous treasure when I noticed a note underneath it on the desk. I picked it up and examined the outside for any signatures as I still have no idea who has been giving me all these gifts of fabulous sugar. There was nothing on the outside so I carefully unfolded the note and read what was inside. My eyes widened with each sentence.
You and I have never met but we will in short time. I chose you randomly for this project and I hope you don’t try to think or figure out the methodology as there really was no deciding factor other than I saw you and thought you’d be perfect. I have been working for years on an innovative idea for a product and finally found the correct formula but needed a test subject. So, for the last month I have left you a cookie. In each cookie there has been a microscopic computer chip which when put in your mouth should have absorbed into your cheek. Once inside you it would travel through your bloodstream to the appropriate location. Each chip once consumed would wait for the next piece. When all of the pieces where in place they would be ready for the final step. You are now holding the final step. This last cookie contains the “activation” chip which will begin a process that is going to take 36 hours to complete as well as a sedative that will assure that you are comfortable during the transformation. I am sure you are overwhelmed by curiosity and fear. Should you choose NOT to eat the cookie the remaining chips will dissolve over the next week. Should you choose to eat it then you will, over the next day and a half, physically become a man for a temporary time period. When you awake after the change I will be there to assist you and document this experiment.
I put the note down on my desk and started at the cookie in my hand. My brain kept spinning as it tried to process all of the information I just read. Looking up at my calendar and then at my overflowing inbox I picked up my desk phone. I called my supervisor and very casually told her, “Jenny, I have a family emergency I will be out of the office for awhile but I’ll let you know as soon as I know something.” As I hung up the phone I looked at the cookie again and decided to eat this one at home in the bed.
I’m working on a writing prompt right now. Its going to be a good one. Its going to be longer than I first anticpated. So, keep your eyes open because at some point this afternoon I will post for all to read. Please feel free to leave me some feedback on the story. I can’t get better or learn without some healthy critiques. Until then enjoy this picture which illustrates all the planets in place of our moon. Its awesome.